Sunday, April 17, 2005

Atheist Fortune Cookies

These quotes are from The Holy Temple of Mass Consumption. There are many more where these came from!

God is real, unless declared integer.
(Bit of a programmer joke.)

"For god so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever would believe in him would believe in anything."

"Jesus died to take our wibbles away, so now we can go to zonk."

Any belief worth having must survive doubt.

I went to church to confess my sins to God. And then I realized there was no God and I had no sins.

(I've also heard one somewhere went something like:
"When did I realize I was God? Well, one day I was praying and realized I was talking to myself.")

The fool says in his heart, "There is no God."The Wise Man Says it to the World.

Re: God... 1) The emperor has no clothes. 2) There is no emperor.

"The difference between science and theology is that science has general validity." [Graham Kendall]

"Saying AMEN after prayer is like hitting the ENTER key." [Graham Kendall]

"The Gish Principle -> If a gap exists between two fossil species, and an intermediate fossil species is discovered, then two gaps are present now and evolution is disproved even more." [Graham Kendall]

"As far as Roland was concerned, God o' the Cross was just another religion which taught that love and murder were inextricably bound together-that in the end, God always drank blood." [Stephen King]

"It's very healthy for a young girl to be deterred from promiscuity by fear of contracting a painful, incurable disease, or cervical cancer, or sterility, or the likelihood of giving birth to a dead, blind, or brain- damage [sic] baby even ten years later when she may be happily married." [Phyllis Schlafly]
(Sarcasm?)

And here is one of my all time favorites, a classic from many years ago:

"The Son of God was crucified; I am not ashamed because men must needs be ashamed of it. And the Son of God dies; it by all means to be believed, because it is absurd. And He was buried, and rose again; the fact is certain, because it is impossible."
[Tertullian, in _The Ante-Nicene Fathers_, by Roberts & Donaldson, Chapter 5 p. 525]

2 comments:

Jvak said...

so...what do you believe? obviously you don't believe in a god, nor do you believe in evolution, which is often the fall-back for the first case. So what do you believe? Why are we here? What is our purpose? Is this really life, or only a perception brought about by complex chemical reactons?

cafinatict@yahoo.com

Mikayla Starstuff said...

Read some of the rest of my blog, and you may find some of your answers.